Tiskatrowa

Heh last post was right before I totally boned my knee.
Long story short I slipped at work which I thought just caused some hyper extention damage, which I have done back when I lived Nottingham.
I looked after it and it started to get better. But two weeks later I had real trouble walking to work and within an hour I heard and felt a couple of wet cracks. Im not going into all the details of going to the hospital, though will mention that they did and still are treating me well.
Near three moneths later I can tell you that I managed to tear three ligaments, rupture my ACL and impact bruise some bone. Ha I remember the first time they told me all that after my first MRI scan (weird things to be in), they basically told me my knee had been in a car accident or a real bad rugby match.... blew my mind. Think the only thing that came out of my mouth was '... I sit, draw and play games.' XD
IVe been going to the hospital gyms Lower limb class for a few weeks now to help rehabilitate and build/rebuild muscle to help towards both surgery and everyday life. Now this may come out strage but. Its quite wonderful to be around a bunch of people with pretty much the same injuries, so everyone is in the same boat and you dont look weird doing a certain set of exercises, cos everyone is doing them.
Surgery could be anytime between now and a couple of months, will know more on wednesday, really cant wait for it. Feels surreal to me as this is the first thing I have had that I cant completely heal myself, just need a little keyhole surgery to sort out that ACL

Otherwise Im doing well, even met Optimus Prime on saturday in a field in Bristol, had a really cool spontaneous day with an ace person. Then had one of the most memorable evenings I have had in a while just wondering around, makes me laugh to myself just remembering some of the silly bits. Goodah goodah times.

Its slowly but surely happening. Im crafting a life again. Some sort of order, sometimes something new, is coming into place.
I actually feel like Im in a room that I can make my own AND move if needed in the next few years. I really want a tall industrial style lamp. Im seriously considering offering to paint the walls a new colour to my landlord.
The first life drawing thingy I went to was mainly to kick my arse into gear, plus I thought to myself 'If I look back in years to come, thinking back that my first life drawing thingy involved pole dancing' was too much to pass up. Though the one last night was a much more traditional one, plus it helped a great deal actually knowing the person running it (shame it was the last one really), and I felt much more fulfilled. Apart from the fact it was much more serious, perhaps not the word im after here, but actually having a much larger canvas and using charcoal rather than pencil or biro really really felt good.
Should I also mention the bass guitar I know own? Aww yes I will. I feel so much more in sync with this than with a six string, plus it just feels so good to feel the strings vibrate more the way I want, if that makes any sense

You have no idea just how content I was on sunday. I pushed myself to go to my first london photowalk and I absolutely adored it.
The people were friendly, the weather was stunning and it was just really fun to be around so many other people taking photos.
It even brought out enough confidence to try taking photos of people. Doesnt sound like much sure but I'm normally taking nature like photos, really wanted to try, a new style is the wrong term, a different approach maybe.
oh it started at trafalgar square, through st james park, across westminister, some went along the embankment and some who got lost like myself went along the bridge and past the millenium eye, to get to the vintage car boot sale. Which was ace.
So many cool things happened and I cant wait till the next one

Im here. Im actually back in london. With my own place/dodge lil room with a location to die for.
It took a while to actually get used to being able to walk home, rather than get an hour twenty min long train journey. It was also such a good thing to have something so familiar, my old job, with such a new location, it really helped get things into perspective. Plus having posters and an actually curtain not made of wafer thin nasty ass green fabric was good for the soul.
Its been a while since Ive felt this content, especially with myself, bring on the next stages.
Anything else I type is pure rambling now, until next time
love and peace

Find the peace within ourselves, No need for a cure
Day by day
Sundowner's theme
The more i write this song, the more I learn it, the more I can sing it, the more awesome it is

It's strange to think, how my current days are, how they are neither bad nor good, just inbetween comfy and boring
Im better than i was a few weeks ago, forgetting how to sleep, looking at a blank canvas only for it to remain blank, writhing with the same thoughts in my head
got me thinking of how my life was this time last year
its strange how i considered myself to be happy then
which was nothing compared to the joy of a few months ago
but in turn before even last year i remembered when my day involved waking up at 6am in the dark, getting back home from work after 8pm in the dark, having shower then food, then always felt like I had to have a mimimum of two cans of strong percentage beer then go to bed and repeat. fuck me i was drinking myself to sleep at one stage in my life
my current days seem stunning compared to then, at least an underlining joy
but more can be done

Year of the snake, you have somehow rung true for me